Many of us, without knowing it, cheat ourselves. We cheat ourselves out of time, having fun, and happiness - because we are cheating ourselves this is something that can be reversed (though it may not be easy, it will be totally worth it!) I too am guilty of this - and often! We, as a people need to free ourselves, so let's do it together! 

First, think about all the times you've been so excited to go somewhere. You're headed to a party, a night out with a friend, or a dance. You get ready, you're set and GO - you get there, all still totally stoked, and then you see the girl across the room that is wearing a really, really beautiful dress. You bought yours at a second-hand shop because you're brilliantly thrifty! You feel self- conscious and there goes your night - NO MORE! First, why should you worry about other people and what they think? Secondly, they are probably feeling the same way you are. Just relax, because this opportunity is once, so carpe diem!! (Seize the day!) and don't feel held back. 

You hate the way your hair looks. You have curly and you want straight, so everyday before school or work you spend 1 hour straightening your hair, fair? That's 365 hours, 15 days, OVER TWO WEEKS a year that you spend...learn to feel comfortable with yourself and spend those two weeks traveling or doing something you find enjoyable. 

You think about your Ex, 'what if I had done this? or if we had tried that?' or in general worrying and beating yourself up over it - keep in mind love that none of this is negatively affecting him, only you - you waste so much time trying to change the past, the only thing you can control is the future. 

Try not to listen to your inner retard, and stop letting it cheat you out of time....you only live once, make the most of every moment! 

Please make sure to check out Monstrous Discrepancies, it is so well done and such an eye opener! 

<3 

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Captions: 1) How closely you feel others are scrutinizing you - how closely they are actually scrutinizing you. 2) How self-assured you assume others are - how self-assured they actually are 3) How sexuality is portrayed - how sexuality is 4) How institutions appear - how institutions are 5) How alone you are - how alone you aren't 6) How fortunate you might feel - how fortunate you might be 7) The perceived significance of one - the potential significance of one 8) How it all can seem... but is it just a dream?
 
Say it out loud, "I am not my body, I am not my body". Correct!

Your body is a vehicle for your true self. Think about it this way - everyone has a car, and people have different types of cars. You take care of your car; you change the oil, put gas in it, you keep it clean and when it's broken you fix it. Your body is your car, it transports you - it allows you to live in this world. Just because someone drives a minivan doesn't mean they are a mom or dad, right? The same with your body, your body is not a definition of who you are, it is a conduit to the world. Every soul is here for their own journey, therefore we all have different types of vehicles - there isn't just one model car out there. 
 
Yes, here it is....it had to happen sometime you know, I have to bring up exercise! 

Now, I'm not going to say that you need to go right now and join and gym and go three or four times a week forever, God no! Personally I hate working out - I don't like all sweating, jiggling and stares that come with it. You don't even have to work out - but you do need to get moving. We all do! 

As previously mentioned, I am not a 'workout' fan. I walk and go clubbing and dance like a fool! There are lots of ways to get moving that aren't conventional. Take the stairs, go swimming, go clubbing, talk a walk, wrestle with the dog, get it on, put the remote next to the TV so you have to get UP to change the Vol. or Channel, park very far away, thoroughly clean the house, squeeze your butt while you brush your teeth - there are plenty of ways to reap those 'moving benefits'! 

Go out into the world and MOVE! 

-M 
 
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Valentines Day. Ahhh yes. For some, it brings such mushiness romance that they almost drown in it, for others it's a painful day where they stay indoors and eat ice cream (I certainly have never done this...), and for the rest it's just another day. How will you celebrate Valentines Day? 

Fuckin' celebrating yourself ALL DAMN DAY - THAT'S HOW! As we all know, Valentines Day is a scheming hallmark holiday anyway, but that doesn't mean we can't seize the opportunity to celebrate! Today, of all days you are entitled to LOVE FEARLESSLY! Love yourself, love those around you, love strangers! Even if you have a significant other, don't forget that you need to love yourself today as much as everyone else - if not more. Indulge, eat tons of guiltless chocolate, and plan a date for yourself, card and all. Write a mantra in your card and put in on your bulletin, so every time you see it you can remember that day you doted on yourself and hopefully it will be a reminder to do so more often! So, be fearless - grab your girlfriends and boyfriends and make sure to let everyone know how much you love them - because giving love is being love :)

Love to all <3

-Mistress  
 
Sometimes you need to reaffirm things, and that's perfectly normal. You remind yourself of things all the time, "oh don't forget milk!, homework assignment X, call mom, etc. etc. etc." the list goes on and on, we all do it. It's become part of the background noise that we live with. One of these reminders needs to be about how completely kick ass you are! In fact, this is such an easy thing to do that children can do it too - (if you have them I encourage you to encourage them to do this!) So take some time to look yourself in the mirror - Naked? ;) - and affirm your love for yourself. Take an example from Jessica!

- Thank you Hilary for submitting this! - 
 
NOT LIKE ORGASMS. You should never fake an orgasm, but we'll discuss that later! 

If you're feeling down or feeling blue, you need to fake it. Get out of the house, smile at people and go out with your friends or take yourself on a date. Before you know it, your sneaky brain will have tricked you into being in a better mood. Promise :) 
 
When you love someone, you celebrate them. You celebrate the day they were born, and the day you met them, when they get promoted, and many other occasions. When you love yourself, you must celebrate yourself. If you feel a little funny 'celebrating yourself' then think of it like this. Your body is a map from your ancestors. That crazy cowlick, the way you laugh, the 'cluztiness', was all handed down to you as part of a bigger picture and you are a tribute to it! 

I celebrate myself by making a fancy dinner or getting dressed up for a night at the laser shows. I buy myself flowers, I paint my nails inappropriate colors, I give myself home facials and these are just a few. 

How do you celebrate yourself? 
 
One part of loving yourself is taking time for yourself. Taking yourself on dates, taking the extra few minutes to add that little something extra to your look that makes you confident, or even just taking the time to give yourself one of those $1 face masks from Krogers - anyway you slice it ... time for self = self love. Well, I've decided to go balls out and visit my best love, Mia in CHICAGO! So, in march I will be heading out to Chicago and staying for several days, I am so stoked! 

The reason I bring this up is because I want to tell you about the powerful experience of traveling alone. Frankly, it is the most empowering thing you can do, having to take the risk of traveling somewhere unknown and alone, but when you finally get to that hotel you weren't sure existed and you get checked in, sit down on your bed, and you realize that you made alive, unraped, and in one piece, what a BAMF you are!! You're ready to take on the whole damn city! If you have never travelled alone, do it as soon as you can. Even if it's only driving to the other side of your state to visit something, you must try it. Even better, hope a bus to that big city you've always wanted to visit, hit up someone on couchsurfer and feel the power flow through you!

Travel sites I recommend: 

megabus.com - MEGA cheap bus fare, however they have limited routes. But for me to go from Columbus to Chicago round trip is usually $30, but the first 3 seats on the bus sell for $.50, so hurry and plan ahead!
www.couchsurfing.org - A network of people all over the globe who are offering up their couches for you to sleep on - FOR FREE in exchange for tales about the great land you come from. I've found that the people on here really are genuine and excited to share culture. When I visited TN I stayed with a Vet and Nurse who were awesome! Everyone is so nice and excited to meet you. Even the Shark Whisperer in NY (No shit, check it out). 
www.kayak.com - Good comparison site for flights, they also offer flexible dates so that you can search a few days around your trip to find the best price. 

Good luck, go forth and explore! 
 
I go on kicks where I'm determined to be healthy and do my best. I usually end up forgetting my goal and immediately sliding back into my old habits, "I'll have a coke!"

I'm hoping that through this blog I'll be able to keep better tabs on my decisions. Right now, for my first impulsive health choice I'm going to give up regular Coke and have Coke Zero in it's stead. Hopefully, that will help with some cut-backs. I think if I do one small change like this a week and just start making it a habit, then tacking on one small change at a time, eventually they will all make up a healthy me. 


Right? 
 
This website, this blog - it is a form of art, no? 

Well, great art comes from great inspiration and for my first post I would like to share some of my inspiration with you. I am on a journey to love myself - disgustingly so! I want to be so in love with who I am, because after all, you will be spending a lot of time with you and in the end, it is you that you can count on, so you might as well love yourself right? I believe so. One great lady who shares these same views is Gala Darling. She has done so much and she lives what she says, she is so convicted in what she says - it's, well, inspiring! She keeps a blog about radical self love that I am working my way through and it has helped me, so I encourage you to check it out. Maybe you can work through it with me :)

http://galadarling.com/